What a simple yet powerful message I received from a patient today….
Patients seek the advice of “experts” because they are suffering or have some questions about a chronic disease process, etc. It is not infrequent for them to wait (ssometimesfor more than an hour) to see us. It is not unusual for them to have to sit and fill out the same forms they have filled out in many other physician’s offices—- and in some instances they are very nervous.
Is it too much for patients to expect us to:
- sit down
- relax
- calm them
- LISTEN
- and explain the issues in terms they should be capable of understanding?
The obvious answer is no… but given the response of this patient ….. reality is far different.
The argument that we do not have time is nonsense…. IMHO… I see a lot of patients each week and do not have a physician extender in my office. It is simply making proper use of the time we have… listen, communicate in easily understood terms and do not appear haggard or rushed…. I feel honored that these patients have chosen me to treat them, and I treat them accordingly. I do not want to be treated or looked at or perceived of as a commodity.
One day… the physician will look in the mirror and see a patient… I hope *that* patient finds a caring, calming, inspiring physician willing to treat them as a human being, after all….
We ARE all patients.
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Stunning. Out of 1000’s of physician-encounters in my family, how have I never seen a doc like this in person?
@ rawarrior Thanks for the comment! They (we) are out there…. not unlike other situations u likely have had w/ other professionals too… second opinions… word of mouth… AND social media can aid us in finding them (me). Therein lies the promise of the intersection of Social Media and Healthcare. Docs don’t need to pay SEO “experts”, or agencies who claim to “get it”… they just need to engage and show that they too are human and understand the suffering and everything that comes along with it.
It continues to amaze me that some docs don’t just listen. Even for 5 minutes. People respond to that little bit of attention and appreciate that we take time out of what they perceive must be our busy day. Just to talk to them. Listen to them. Show that we care about them. It makes all the difference in the world.
It all comes down to raw empathy. As a pediatric resident I never understood the plight of the parent. Before my parents became elderly I was impatient with those along in years. Our experiences, our maturity and our willingness to put ourselves in another’s shoes define us as clinicians.
Sherry Turkle in her book, Alone Together, sees it as authenticity.
“Authenticity, for me, follows from the ability to put oneself in the place of another, to relate to the other because of a shared store of human experiences: we are born, have families, and know loss and the reality of death”
Wel said Bryan… enjoy your long weekend.